Choices Made
by MoonSword1994
Summary: Shepard's final thoughts and reflections on the past. Post-ME3 Synthesis ending.


**A/N: This is meant to be ambiguous. Anyone's Shepard, and most of their choices, can fit into this story. Enjoy.**

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Everything I have done has lead up to this moment, this choice. Standing here before the three options given to me, I know in my heart which choice I am going to make, I do not even have to think twice. I start limping down the walkway, my eyes glued to the target and whereas before my body felt like a lumbering mass, it suddenly feels light. Like it knows what is about to happen.

I think about all that has brought me to this pivotal moment, everything and everyone that had ever meant anything to me. An image of my parents springs into my mind's eye, they're both smiling, and I know they would be proud of me and what I am about to do. Their smiles keep my legs moving. My mind goes to the beginning of my career as an Alliance officer, when I had to chose between saving myself and saving others. I take comfort in knowing that even then it was natural to me to chose innocents over myself and I shake a few doubts from my thoughts. I am reminded of Eden Prime and my first encounter with the enemy my friends were now fighting, I feel the same fire to stop the Reapers now as I had then and that makes me know I am alive. Noveria and the Rachni Queen are next to show themselves, the first difficult call I had to make, and I am glad I did not commit genocide. If I had, the galaxy would not be filled with their beautiful music and would be lesser for it. The thought fills me with pride as I continue the long walk to my destiny.

The image that comes next forces me to pause as I remember. I can see Virmire as plainly as if I were standing on it's surface right now, still feel the cold panic that grips my body as my head is filled with the voices of my two friends. I had to chose one, forcing the other to die alone, cursing Saren's name as I made my decision. This had not been one of the easy choices and even in this moment I wish it could have been me instead. I would find out soon if my friend had forgiven me or not, and I was looking forward to that moment with great anticipation. Joker is next, my dearest and truest friend, the man I had saved the day I lost everything. I know without a doubt I made the right choice that day, I know that I am leaving him in good hands with EDI.

I am shown Tuchanka and Rannoch next, two places where I had made the biggest difference. For Wrex and Grunt, I had given their species the ability to thrive again, and under Bakara's guidance, Tuchanka would be a beautiful place again where Krogan children could be happy. While I had lost a friend that day, I know he was happy when he died, having changed the course of an entire species for the better. Tali and Legion had been given the greatest gift any one person could give them: hope for their people. I had been there to broker peace between the Quarians and the Geth, given them the opportunity to thrive together instead of continuing a war that should have never started in the first place. That had been an easy choice for me, though at the time I had been worried that I might lose both of my friends, instead I lost one in a heroic sacrifice. I am going to see them again, and so many others. I smile and press on, knowing I just have a few more yards.

I reach the abyss and stare down, the energy so strong it sings to my soul, and again I know I have reached the right conclusion. I think briefly of the other options I had been given earlier. The option to control is unfair, while the Reapers have destroyed countless lives, I know they were only doing as they were created like the Geth before they gained understanding. I will not subject them to my whims, they deserve to be free to make their own decisions and find their own purpose. While I know I would probably survive the blast, I cannot bring myself to destroy all synthetic life, who am I to play God? I cannot dictate who is worthy to live and die based on nothing but the past when I know the future could be so much more. No, this is the only option that is fair to all but one, and I can accept that fate.

I prepare to jump when Anderson's face springs up in front of my mind's eye. My long time mentor and friend, a good man I had put in a position he did not enjoy but did more for humanity than I ever could. He died trying to protect me, trying to keep me from the Illusive Man's clutches, and without him the galaxy was now darker. He would have understood my decision, understood why I must make this sacrifice, and he would have been proud. Yeah, Anderson would have been proud.

Before I am able to make my final decision, I am reminded of the love of my life and of my remaining friends. What I do today will hurt them, I know, I will be gone and unable to tell them how much they truly meant to me. When we started this war, we spoke about it as if we were all going to make it through, so there was no point then speaking of how much we were going to miss each other if we did not make it. I know they will be angry with me but I have left them all with enough memories to last two lifetimes, and hopefully that will be enough until we meet again. I briefly wish for just one more moment with them, wanting to tell them all that everything I have done I did for them, but I know if I were able to see them again I could never look away.

I take a deep breath, my last taste of reality and jump headfirst into the energy beam. The effect is immediate. I feel my body start to change, being broken down to the smallest form possible and merged with the energy around me, creating new life. My final physical act is a smile. I smile at the knowledge that I, who never thought to have children, would give new life to the entire galaxy. I smile knowing I leave this galaxy a better place then when I first came into it and that I had brought people together whom would take care of it as it deserved. Finally, I smile as I am released.

Heros will always rise when called upon, this had been proven time and again. I am proof of that, as was Anderson, Hackett, and several others that are merely remembered on pages in history books. This is my final act, my last choice, one that will impact every generation born after me. Our choices echo through the centuries, even the small ones, and will continue to influence those who will come after. I will not live to see the true impact of my decisions but then again, none of the greats do, we live our lives and are gone before we see the fruits of our labor. There is no place for heros once we have done the impossible, we are chained to the image of being heros, expected forever to be who we no longer are. So my final act is ultimately selfish, by freeing the galaxy I free myself, and so I smile.


End file.
